Codependents R' Us

We wonder why we keep ending up in the same horrible relationships with - at the worst abusive men or at the least emotionally constipated ones.

When we start seeing a negative pattern in relationships, it is time to take a hard look at ourselves. 

Those of us who tend to be Codependent, usually have low self esteems from a variety of childhood issues. When we are insecure, we tend to seek out relationships where we can "save" someone so we feel we are needed or have a purpose. It then turns into a terribly emotionally manipulative(on both sides) and horribly dysfunctional situation that we call a "relationship." 

Codependency is a hard cycle to break. For many it may be the only kind of relationships that we have ever had ~ taking care of a parent as a child, trying to get the attention of an absent parent, etc. But if having an emotionally healthy life, which includes our relationships; is a goal of yours - codependency must be addressed.

It may not be something you can totally change over night, but realizing that the dynamic is occurring is the first step in a healthier direction. When we realize we have set up a codependent relationship, we must admit that we have both played into establishing that dynamic. We can never truly change the way another person acts or treats us, so focusing on our own role is the easiest way to begin making change. 

There is a certain amount of dependency in any relationship but when it is harmful or emotionally damaging to either or both parties; then it is not a healthy aspect of that relationship.

◈◈◈◈◈◈ BELIEVE IN YOURSELF ◈◈◈◈◈◈

(It should be noted that I am not a behavior specialist - there are many great books out there addressing the issue and of course professional therapy.) 

The Greatest Love of All - Reggae style Whitney cover dedication from Leah Beabout by LeahBeabout